I'm disgruntled, people. That's right, I still don't have Quake 3 Arena within my grasp. However, I just got paid, so you can guarantee (said with a Cajun accent) that tomorrow, I will pick it up! Then, in my usual way, I'll blast my way to the top, kill Xaero or whatever the hell his name is, become the grandmaster and promptly move on to fragging Hellchick. Oh yeah, and the new era begins soon.
Newbies, Newbies Everywhere, So Let's All..
Listen in. This past week, Doomhammer fired in his article on his first online experience. Some sympathise, others ridicule. You, the oh-so-important PlanetQuake readers, are the only ones who can tell us for sure. Pull our strings!
From: John Cuyle
Subject: I am not sure if I should weep openly or laugh as mush as your friend
I thought about laughing bit then thought "Why would I do that? All true
gamers have had there Mad Skillz robbed from them at some point in there
gaming lives. Be it when you load up a internet game and have to lag reak
havok on your mouse (or ball or,ugh,keyboard) or when you first do a LAN
game were you realize that everything suddenly moves at a hyper fast speed."
I in my mind am young for a true gamer (13 and grabbing any game I can not
to beat it, not to critisize or compare, but to experience a new plot or
style I have never seen before) and I have heard stories such as this told
around a dimmly lit monitor screens as a horror tales. That is why early
(9) I began bombarding myself with all sorts of different styles of play
either LAN, or internet to not only be better in all but to have fun and
make friends easily no matter what I decide to do. Sure its been tough,
sure I've tended to stray toward LAN more then internet, sure I'm a good to
great (not excellent or death in carnate) player but I feel happy no no
proud and honored that I may be the future and bring these two styles of
gameplay together allowing everyone the joy of being good at all games and
further unify one small thread of the gameing industry. Whoa that feels
sooooo good to get that off my chest, Victory to all, Hail to the Carmack,
and good luck.
From: norm shipley
Subject: somthing to say
Well doomhammer i read your story and rolled on the floor like your freind but the real truth is.That is the same thing that happend to me.And i just wanted to say i have met alot of people that are fun to frag with. Even when there stomping a new name into the meaning of look out behind you or in front of ya on top of ya under ya you know what i mean. so i just wanted to say this has been the most fun i have had on the internet since i started. So to finish this letter let me say I WILL FRAG YA LATER. hope to see you there.
by sniper (NEO)
Hellchick: "in front of ya on top of ya under ya"...sounds
vaguely naughty. Are you sure you were deathmatching?
From: Christian "XchiN"
Subject: My First Real Deathmatch responce.
I would have to say that my first real deathmatch expierence was on my local bbs. This was back in the day when all you needed was a 486 and a 14.4 modem because you where only recieving ANSI graphics, unless you where really cool and using Major BBS's World Group GUI.
Well to make a long story short the Major BBS software had a "plugin" for it called game center where people on the BBS could start and host Doom via Sirdoom. It was really sweet. Everyone on the local BBS new each other and we had our own favorite WAD files that we liked to play. Mostly this one map called cloud something, it's vague and I don't really remember it all to much.
You would never really expiernce any lag, just a lot of good clean fun. I always got my ass kicked though cause I never understood the straif concept at the time, but as time grew on I got the hang of hold down alt and ctrl at the same time.
I just thought that I would share my first DM expierence.
Hellchick: We all remember the day we lost our deathmatch
virginity fondly, don't we? Mine was in the backseat of a Chevy
From: Michael Otakusan
Subject: online experience
This story mirrors what I'm going through now. After moving back to
Florida from Georgia, I get awful connections to the net. They used to
be at 28.8, now I'm lucky to get 21.6 from 19.2. Trying to play on those
connects is like playing with interstate traffic. It just shouldn't be
done! And being a 'boarder *I still get picked on, but I now see why*
really didn't win me any frags, even if I was lucky to get one from the
maxed out ping on the server. But don't worry, once I get my cable
modem, I too will become a "rail toting 0 ping n00b"! And don't think I
won't be happy being called this, but what the hell, a frag is a
Well hey, this is one of the few weeks I haven't had to deal
with gigantic volumes of e-mail that just bury me so much I have
to spend 2 hours going through mail. Sorry, Doomhammer, you just
didn't cut it! Hehehe. I'm so mean sometimes. Some people are
very mean to newbies. That's how I'm connecting this response
to the actual subject. I remember my first online experience like
it was yesterday.. This nekkid chick asked me for my credit card
number and.. oh.. you mean Quake? Oh, okay. I jumped on a local
server and got about 3 frags in 3 hours of playing. I didn't mouse
aim. I sucked. But now I pw33n. I found The Oracle. Someday you
will too, Hellchick.. don't cry.. we all can't be as good as I
Hellchick: Spyke! Spyke!! Wake up! You're having that
dream again where you imagine that you're really good at Quake!
You Tease You!
We're such teasers. Just for kicks, we put up this, to give you a little taste of the Flashy stuff Mix, our crack (in more way than one) designer can put together. Mix rox. By the way, this teaser is for the new era, which is coming very soon, sooner than you think!
Subject: "The New PQ"
Why are you guys changing your look?
Do you think it's wise to change a winning look?
Or are you the types who think "Oh my god, so-and-so
changed their look, we've got to do it!!"
Be smart, people like your look. Do you think
you get as many visitors as you do because your
pages aren't attractive/well-designed.
Okay, I have to respond here. First off, "Jeff", I don't like your tone.
Second, we're changing our look because we have to. See the redesigns
all the other GSN pages are getting? Well, we aren't excluded.
It's not really a winning look. It's hard to find stuff, and we
realize that. So, we're going with the new network design because
we have to, it looks good, and it works. We're not copying.. despite
what you might think, PlanetUnreal and all the other GSN sites
are our friends. Except for those PlanetHalfLife bastards.
Hellchick: Spyke's right. The current design just doesn't
cut it anymore - no one can find anything. We've had several complaints
that we haven't featured Quake III: Arena content enough lately.
Know why? Because our current design doesn't allow us to do that
properly. Once you see the new design, Jeff, you'll come around.
You'll be a convert, and we will have assimilated you into our
cult. Yeeeeeessssss...my plan is coming together quite nicely...(rubs
hands together in a vaguely evil fashion)
Subject: DON'T DO IT!
Please... listen to human reason.. I saw the Flash
animation "You and Your Rocket Launcher".... and what
hideous thing do I see at it's end? A "Planet*" Logo
WHY?! Why why why why why?
And why BROWN? Sure it was the primary color in
Classic Quake, but I thought we moved passed that.
Please... keep the layout you have now. It's still
pretty fresh. It's also ORIGINAL.
Don't bow down. Damn the man. Save the empire.
Hellchick: I'm not really sure why people associate the
upcoming change in our design to some sort of "gettin' on
our knees in front of Da Man" kind of thing. How about this
for an analogy: it's 1999 and you're still wearing lime-green
polyester bellbottoms from 1976, and your hair hasn't seen a barber
since the Ford administration. It's awful. You wouldn't get a
date in that sort of getup, and we wouldn't continue to get fans
to Quake and PQ with our old design. Face it, Matt - things change!
And that's a good thing! If it weren't, we'd all be wearing rhinestone-studded
denim jackets, and my hair would be feathered like Farrah Fawcett's.
And that's something no one wants to see.
From: (address deleted)
Subject: the planetquake movie, You and Your Rocket Launcher
Funny, but the voice was messed up. I'm thinking it was a low quality mp3,
that happened to me once.
Yeah, sure, it was an mp3. We just found that shit on the net somewhere, and it fit absolutely perfectly into the Flash presentation. What a find, eh? Anyways, as most of you know by now, the "new era" is the PQ redesign. It pw33ns. It is coming.... soon. Bwahahaha!
Inverters and miscellaneous tripe on page two!