Week: Male pubic hair scultping and why you should
do it, a guy that sounds like a girl even though he's post
puberty, a penis with a great big nasty mole on it, some reknob
wants a Mynx and Hellchick sandwich, and a question about
Killcreek's nudies. Doesn't it just make you want to
lather up in mayonnaise and eat a carrot??
It's A Veritable Forest Down There
Recently, my college-student colleagues
and I have been discussing some of the finer points of male
grooming. When pubic hair maintenance came up, many
different styles had surfaced and each person had an argument
for their selections. Most guys shaved, while some plucked
(uh, OWW) and others didn't do anything at all. So what
I'm wondering is, besides the obvious (or not so obvious judging
from my unofficial poll) trim around the pole makes one's
knob look particularly attractive and/or pleasurable??
Do women prefer a hairy guy or shaved clean as a whistle like
a common pr0n star?? Any thoughts?
to tell you the truth, most of the male pubic regions I've
seen, ahem, firsthand... have been pretty much left alone.
I've not really known any guys who are into pubic hair sculpting,
but it could be that I just travel in the wrong circles. As
for what I personally would find interesting... obviously
if your pubic hair grows especially long and straight, you
should give it a trim. At the least it can be an
annoying tickle, at the worst it can cause some pain.
An ex of mine once showed up shaved clean as a whistle. Mildly
shocking and an interesting change of pace, but stubble is
not something you'd want to deal with on an everyday basis.
Eh, for guys, usually leaving it alone is fine.
A bald basket or a close trim can give the illusion
of a bigger basket though, so if you're after a little
enhancement, this could be your key.
When Its Time To Change You Got To Rearrange.
OK, here's the thing. I'm 18 and
recovering from the puberty effect (ie 99% complete).
However, I still have a feminine voice, which is weird because
I'm pretty sure it's broken. Anyway, that I can handle.
What does get my goat (ie. makes me angry, not the other thing)
is when I speak I phone helplines/support/phone directories/etc.
and they say "Yes Madam...", "Madam...", yadayadayada Madam.
What snappy comeback could I use so that they get the message
that I am indeed male without sounding too rude but giving
them a quick slap upside the head?
hey, it's not their fault, you're the one that talks like
a girl. Seriously, who cares if they make the mistake?
Just correct them. If they give you a "Madam", simply
say "that would be Sir, actually." Correcting them at
all will embarrass the person and probably make them feel
bad for possibly insulting you. Then they'll hang up
and giggle with their coworkers about the guy on the phone
that sounded like a chick. But you'll never know, so
don't let it get your panties in a twist. It's not a
Penis By Braille
Thankfully I'm blessed with a very large
and happy member, lets just say I'm extremely way up there
in the kinsley reports. That's not the problem at all, its
just that smack on the center of my wanker there's a relatively
unobtrusive mole that when giving the standing salute can
turn into a relatively large spot. It's not festering or about
to pop either, its just a big flat dark spot that looks like
a big moldy eyepatch on captain spankydoo. I have no problem
with moles on the body, a few beauty marks here and there
are very attractive, but if I found a big festering mole giving
me the evil eye on my woman's lips while takin a dive I'd
kind of be turned off a bit. I'm too self conscious to ask
the woman. What should I do? Is it a turn off?
Welp, short of having it surgically removed (which means PAIN,
on your poor cute little tusk!) there's not much of anything
you can do. If the mole is growing hairs or changing
shapes, that's every indication that you should have it checked
out by a doctor. But if it's just a harmless little
old mole, then leave it be. It's not going to hurt anybody
and I'm sure that any woman who, well, comes across it will
be able to identify it as a mole and not some big genital
wart or herpe or some such animal. Don't let these minor
imperfections get you down - I found out yesterday that pigs
have CORKSCREW shaped penises. So count your blessings. You
could be facing life with a twisted tooter.
Gunna Hafta Send You Back To Bitch School
I am pleasantly shocked and amazed at
how densely PQ has been populated by females of late.
It gets me all atwitter to imagine all of you girls doing
your dirty rocket launching deeds there at PQ. What
would it take to get you and HellChick to doubleteam me?
I mean, as IF! What makes you think that a couple of
worldly game girls such as ourselves would even remotely consider
some yucky email come on? Besides the fact that we're
both all married and stuff, we have like, taste, and stuff.
Oh, and we're not the only PQ chicks, you know - find someone
else to do your dirty rocket.
Do you know if Killcreek's Playboy pictorial
is out yet? I'm dying to get a look at the golden
glove of the gaming industry. Speaking of which, when
are we going to see yours?
You're not. I like to know who it is that's gazing and
or wanking upon whatever it is I'm displaying.
I work better on a first hand basis, if you know what I mean.
As far as Ion's little rabbit, last I heard the issue had
been pushed to May, back from the earlier release date of
March. So, you're just going to have to keep strangling
your mangler to back issues of Shugashack or something
to pass the time.