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Dear
Mynx

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    PlanetQuake | Features | Dear Mynx | Spiral Hogmeat.
   

This Week:  Male pubic hair scultping and why you should do it, a guy that sounds like a girl even though he's post puberty, a penis with a great big nasty mole on it, some reknob wants a Mynx and Hellchick sandwich, and a question about Killcreek's nudies.  Doesn't it just make you want to lather up in mayonnaise and eat a carrot??


  It's A Veritable Forest Down There
Recently, my college-student colleagues and I have been discussing some of the finer points of male grooming.  When pubic hair maintenance came up, many different styles had surfaced and each person had an argument for their selections.  Most guys shaved, while some plucked (uh, OWW) and others didn't do anything at all.  So what I'm wondering is, besides the obvious (or not so obvious judging from my unofficial poll) trim around the pole makes one's knob look particularly attractive and/or pleasurable??  Do women prefer a hairy guy or shaved clean as a whistle like a common pr0n star?? Any thoughts?

-Forrest

Well to tell you the truth, most of the male pubic regions I've seen, ahem, firsthand... have been pretty much left alone.  I've not really known any guys who are into pubic hair sculpting, but it could be that I just travel in the wrong circles.  As for what I personally would find interesting... obviously if your pubic hair grows especially long and straight, you should give it a trim.  At the least it can be an annoying tickle, at the worst it can cause some pain.  An ex of mine once showed up shaved clean as a whistle.  Mildly shocking and an interesting change of pace, but stubble is not something you'd want to deal with on an everyday basis.  Eh, for guys, usually leaving it alone is fine.  A bald basket or a close trim can give the illusion of a bigger basket though, so if you're after a little enhancement, this could be your key.


  When Its Time To Change You Got To Rearrange.
OK, here's the thing.  I'm 18 and recovering from the puberty effect (ie 99% complete).  However, I still have a feminine voice, which is weird because I'm pretty sure it's broken.  Anyway, that I can handle. What does get my goat (ie. makes me angry, not the other thing) is when I speak I phone helplines/support/phone directories/etc. and they say "Yes Madam...", "Madam...", yadayadayada Madam.  What snappy comeback could I use so that they get the message that I am indeed male without sounding too rude but giving them a quick slap upside the head?

-Shemale

Well, hey, it's not their fault, you're the one that talks like a girl.  Seriously, who cares if they make the mistake?  Just correct them.  If they give you a "Madam", simply say "that would be Sir, actually."  Correcting them at all will embarrass the person and probably make them feel bad for possibly insulting you.  Then they'll hang up and giggle with their coworkers about the guy on the phone that sounded like a chick.  But you'll never know, so don't let it get your panties in a twist.  It's not a big deal. 


  Penis By Braille
Thankfully I'm blessed with a very large and happy member, lets just say I'm extremely way up there in the kinsley reports. That's not the problem at all, its just that smack on the center of my wanker there's a relatively unobtrusive mole that when giving the standing salute can turn into a relatively large spot. It's not festering or about to pop either, its just a big flat dark spot that looks like a big moldy eyepatch on captain spankydoo. I have no problem with moles on the body, a few beauty marks here and there are very attractive, but if I found a big festering mole giving me the evil eye on my woman's lips while takin a dive I'd kind of be turned off a bit. I'm too self conscious to ask the woman. What should I do? Is it a turn off?

-Spotted Dick

Welp, short of having it surgically removed (which means PAIN, on your poor cute little tusk!) there's not much of anything you can do.  If the mole is growing hairs or changing shapes, that's every indication that you should have it checked out by a doctor.  But if it's just a harmless little old mole, then leave it be.  It's not going to hurt anybody and I'm sure that any woman who, well, comes across it will be able to identify it as a mole and not some big genital wart or herpe or some such animal.  Don't let these minor imperfections get you down - I found out yesterday that pigs have CORKSCREW shaped penises.  So count your blessings.  You could be facing life with a twisted tooter.


  Gunna Hafta Send You Back To Bitch School
I am pleasantly shocked and amazed at how densely PQ has been populated by females of late.  It gets me all atwitter to imagine all of you girls doing your dirty rocket launching deeds there at PQ.  What would it take to get you and HellChick to doubleteam me? 

-Skipper

Ew, I mean, as IF!  What makes you think that a couple of worldly game girls such as ourselves would even remotely consider some yucky email come on?  Besides the fact that we're both all married and stuff, we have like, taste, and stuff.  Oh, and we're not the only PQ chicks, you know - find someone else to do your dirty rocket.



 Bunny Time
Do you know if Killcreek's Playboy pictorial is out yet?  I'm dying to get a look at the golden glove of the gaming industry.  Speaking of which, when are we going to see yours?

You're not.  I like to know who it is that's gazing and or wanking upon whatever it is I'm displaying.  I work better on a first hand basis, if you know what I mean.  As far as Ion's little rabbit, last I heard the issue had been pushed to May, back from the earlier release date of March.  So, you're just going to have to keep strangling your mangler to back issues of Shugashack or something to pass the time.

 

 


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