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Dear
Mynx

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HTTP/1.1 404 Object Not Found Server: Microsoft-IIS/5.0 Date: Tue, 02 Jun 2009 13:42:31 GMT Cluster-Server: WEB1 P3P: CP="NOI ADMa OUR STP" X-Powered-By: ASP.NET Connection: close Content-Type: text/html

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    PlanetQuake | Features | Dear Mynx | Winkies!!
   

Got problems with your girlfriend because she can't take your constant Quake playing? Are you finding yourself just a little too attracted to the game models? Then talk to Mynx and she'll sort it all out for you!

This Week:  Guest hosting continues, now with new, improved, honey crunches of Graeme Devine!  Check out what the ole Graemester has to say about girls, good sex, Quake fetishes, tiny penises, and Mynx vs. Hellchick in jello.  Graeme rules.

  Do It or Not, That Is The Question
I think you should be able to help me out here Mynx. I've been friends with this girl for a while now and we are very close to doin' the nasty. We're not going out or anything, just friends and I'm worried that if we do go through with having sex it would ruin our friendship that we have. Or would it just make it better and us closer? I always hear about people breaking friendships because they had a relationship...and I don't want that to happen. Any idea what I should do here Mynx? Oh yeah. My dog licks herself too much. How can I make her stop. Thanks.

-Knocker

Well, the easiest way to help the dog is to get a water pistol.

Golly, you're asking a game developer what to do here?  The thing here is that any step you make with this girl is going to be the next step in your relationship?  Do you want to move the relationship on from the good friend you have now to the girlfriend that she could become?  Depending on your answer to that you'll find the answer about what to do.

  But... Is It GOOD?
I really REALLY want to have sex.  How good is it anyway?  I'm actually very handsome for someone of my age (lets say between 14 and 17).  Do you think an older woman would do it with me if I asked her.  Like you hellchick, I bet if you saw me you would want some.  But would you really take it? 

-Nutjob

Wow, well thanks for the offer, but I'm not hellchick, and she's quite married.  I'll take your question that you want to have sex with someone else, since I'm sure you're already quite versed with the solo version of the act.  Moving on from there doesn't mean having some empty sex with someone, say a hooker, for the heck of it.  The next move is to have sex with someone who actually means something to you, which means you first need to get a relationship with someone.  Of course, you can't just cultivate a relationship with the goal of breaking in your tools, so you'll have to get with the rest of the world and put your heart out there.

  Wood Is Good
I can't stop playing Quake, partially because every time I load the bad boy up I find myself with a rather commendable banger.  Do you know why this happens?  Is it a bad thing?  Should I just enjoy it and frag away?

-Sausage McMuffin

Quake is a game, it's not a sex toy (although, hmmmmm).  What you find exciting about it is something you need to work out, and I bet a lot of people out there have a fetish similar to yours.  I'd just enjoy yourself and frag anyway, you're probably at a disadvantage if you play with one hand, but heck, whatever makes you happy.  

   Wee Little Peenies
I have a problem mynx. my fleshy allstar down there is not what it should be. im 25 years old and its 4 inches long. whats even worse is that its also 3 inches in girth! It's a horrible sight and whenever a girl gets down there she either screams or laughs. is there any sort of product or attachment that i can use to mask my square penis? please help me!


-Stubby 

Okay, embarrassing as a trip to the doc is on a problem like this, it's time for a trip to the doc.  He's got solutions for you that can make a huge (literally) difference to the quality of your sex life.  This is the 21st century, we've got pills for this now.

   Is It Cherry Jello?
If John Carmack refereed a hot jello wrestling match between Hellchick and Mynx... who would win?

-Captain Lou 

I think the jello would win because it's got the best reflection mapping, LOD bias, and heat conductivity.  Hellchick and Mynx may have the best curve code, but we did curves in Quake 3, so it's old news.


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