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    PlanetQuake | Features | Dear Mynx | Nubblywhomper

Got problems with your girlfriend because she can't take your constant Quake playing? Are you finding yourself just a little too attracted to the game models? Then talk to Mynx and she'll sort it all out for you!

This Week: Blaming entertainment for society's woes, nipples nipples nipples, holding out for twue yove, getting your freak on during camp and carrying it over into Real Life, a question of boners, and the return of the ES. More, more, more!


  Place The Blame

What I want to know is why are certain bands and violent video games the scape-goat for everything that is wrong in todays society? Like for instance, the little kids that were imitating Mortal Kombat moves ended up killing a little girl.

Now, I've been playing violent video games since I was a wee lad and I've always known that I couldn't do that stuff from video games. And even if I could, I wouldnt. People would die. I'd never ever see them again. I think there was something wrong with these children to begin with or something. Maybe it was how the parents raised the children. Neglect can cause children to not ever know the difference. If parents are overly abusive, then children are likely to act just the same.

And what about music? Music is now being blamed for suicides. I recently heard about someone who jumped off a building or something. It was quickly noted that this person listened to lots of Linkin Park and in the lyrics to One Step Closer went something like, "Everything you say to me takes me one step closer to the edge and I'm about to break." so now Linkin Park is being blamed for this persons death. That is rediculous! When my friends parents heard this, they took all his KoRn, Limp Bizkit, Linkin Park among others cd's and broke them in half and threw them out. As soon as they heard about the murders mentioned above, they did much the same to any game they deemed violent. He barely knew what Quake was until he met me. If his parents knew what we listened to or played, they would probably break me in half and throw me in the garbage like everything else they feel could have a negative effect on their son.

My brother mentioned this to me the other day. Once my parents split up, I went into a sort of slump and was on the edge of suicidal really. I never really thought about it, but if I had, I'm sure the idea would have gotten more and more appealing and I eventually would have done it. I was like this for about a year and it appeared as though I would stay like this. I stumbled across the bands Gravity Kills and KoRn and they quickly became my favorite bands. My brother says that since I've started listening to them, I've certainly crawled out of my depressive slump. I don't think they had much to do with it, he is completely sure that thoes bands had a positive effect on me. I just liked the music. Hehe. I don't really pay attention to lyrics.


Maybe this should be a sort of editorial or something...

As a parent myself, I've tussled with these very issues. But y'know what? As a wise old lady said to me once, "if you just talk to your damn kids, everything will be okay". And, it is true. The more you forbid something, the more interesting it becomes. The more you take away choices from your kids, the sneakier and less open they become. It was not so long ago that I was a kid, y'know. ;) I remember when things I found interesting were forbidden - in my case, it was Sam Kinison tapes and books that were "too old" for me - I just listened to or read them behind my parents' backs, and I didn't talk to them when I had questions about things that were said. Kids are not as dumb as we adults think they are. Our issue was guns. I didn't like the idea of my kid playing with toy guns, and when he went to play with a water pistol, I told him how I feel about guns. His response? "Mom, it's a PRETEND gun. Water doesn't hurt anybody!" Well... uhm..gee... guess he had a point there, namsayn?

Part of the problem here is that we want to live in a blame free state. Nobody wants to take any blame, they all want to place blame on OTHER people. Individuals certainly can't shoulder "blame" or responsibility for their own actions - blame it on a computer game. Blame it on music. in 1986, Judas Priest was sued by the parents of two teenage boys because of a double suicide (one succeeded, the other kid lived). The case was eventually thrown out in 1990. Anyone who has read this column more than once or twice will know that I strongly advocate personal responsibility on all levels. People that whine about games or music or whatever turning children into killing machines.. well, they can kiss my big white butt. :)



Why do some chiks have huge nipples while some have tiny or at least what I thought was normal sized nipples? Or do they get that much large when aroused? Just something I never understood...

And what the hell does THO stand for, I mean I know its when you see a chik with hard nipples you can easily see them through the shirt/bra. But, the acronym (sp?) is at a complete loss to me! ehe

THO = Titty Hard On. Duh. As for why nipples vary? Genetics. You never know what you'll get.. they're like two little surprises in every bra!


  Silly Wabbit, Chicks Are For Kids!

Well, I've always wanted to write to you just to see what you'd say, but now I actually have a reason to. Here's some background on me so you know what to think. I'm 19, a junior at UT where women run rampant and I'm a total computer geek, but I go to parties a lot too. Now, from what I've been told (and think), I'm a good looking guy, funny, sweet, a good body (I work out a lot), and I have goals (medicine) which is hard to find in a good looking guy at UT. On to the predicament. I am in love with one girl who lives about 650 miles away at home. I've known her since the 9th grade and we both know that we love each other. We've told each other we want to make love and all that stuff. It's really special too because yes, I am still a virgin (I was holding out for marriage, but decided to go ahead and do it with her since I love her). So, now, I just met this gorgeous girl. I don't know her very well, but want to get to know her much better. "Much" better. Now, the first girl has a boyfriend, but talks to me as if she didn't. She called me one day at 2:30 in the morning just to tell me she loves me. I love her very much, but she and I know that we're not going to be together unless we lived in the same city since we're not the sort of people who can do that. So I am don't know what to do. I'm at summer school at UT now and shes back home, 650 miles away. So what should I do? Go for this new girl, or hold out for the other girl at home...

My dear boy, you are what as known as a Plan B. Oh yes, that's right.. you are the backup for this girl if her boyfriend does not work out. She's keeping you around "just in case". Tsk tsk. She's all sucking up his pork chop and then calling you in the wee hours of the morn just to make sure she still has you on a string. God, chicks totally suck. :P If y'ask me (and, hey, you did!) I'm gunna say that neither of these girls sounds like all that, although the new girl would probably be the winnar, if I had to choose one. Just, like, don't go off revenge screwing her just to get back at the first girl, because that won't make anyone happy. If things develop into a good relationship and you find yourself wanting to take that step, then by all means, take the ole plunge, so to speak. Good luck, my man!


  Hootchie During Camp Rocks

Somewhat new reader here, I was introduced to your column about 2 months ago. Anywho, here's my problem.

Like most of the geek population, I've had a hard time trying to find a girl. This past week, I was at a camp with females. Hot damn. I figured it couldn't hurt to try. Turns out I was right, I hooked up with a girl before the week was out (yay). Now the problem: Originally, I was just looking for a fling, just something to get experience from. Plus, she lives like 2 hours from where I live and her parents hate me. That's all well and good, but I really do miss her. Is this worth pursuing or not?

2 hours isn't that huge of a deal, and its worth it if you really dig someone. Besides, absence can make the heart go fonder, sometimes (just look at the poor dude above!). Watch out, though, because sometimes one night stands just aren't meant to turn into relationships. And what's with the parents, anyhow? They probably don't even know you, and don't even care to - no dude is good enough for their little girl. Certainly not some mack daddy nerd like you! No parent likes the thought of their daughter maowing down on the kielbasa, namsayn?


  Why Ask Why?

I have a tendency to get a boner when I have my shirt off and am around other people of either sex. How can I stop this from happening, and why does it happen when I have my shirt off?

Ah, youth! You probably are at an age where your hormones are raging and your body is responding. When your shirt comes off.. BOING! Sex time! At least, as far as your nubblywhomper is concerned. Your brain has nothing to do with it at this age, I'm afraid. My best advice is to uh, keep your shirt on around people you aren't interested in jabbing. Easy enough, eh?


  Embarrassment Spotlight

Yes, kids! That's right! It is time to bring back the good old Embarrassment Spotlight! So here's my open call: send me your most embarrassing, most horrifying, most redfaced moments to be printed here for all to see!


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