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    PlanetQuake | The PQ Poll | 05/10/00

The PQ Poll: May 10, 2000
Got poll questions you think we should use? Email them to!

Did you get a seat in the 512-player QuakeCon tourney?

Answer Votes
Yes! I registered as soon as it was physically possible and/or bribed someone with money and/or illicit favors.
I tried, but it filled up before I could snag a spot.
I didn't bother trying to get one.
There's a tourney at QuakeCon?

Mynx: QC tourney - the ultimate Nerd Herd.
Hellchick: I should be playing in the tourney. If not, I plan on muscling my way into it with network cables and a shiv made from a sharpened piece of an old modem.
Pappy-R: Being 9,872nd really sux sometimes.
Spyke: Didn't bother. I'm not going, and even if I did, I'd be spending too much time following Paul Steed around, asking him for pickup lines.
Fragmaster: Screw that. I'd rather have a seat in a 512-people capacity Burger King. At least there I could get me DA FOOD HOOKUP.
Fargo: I hate any tourney that uses a "cattle call" as qualifying rounds. Free-for-all-Skill doesn't equal one-on-one skill. Often one frag would separate who went on and who stayed behind. Lots of decent one-on-one players get left out -- I hope they fix that this year.
Lee'Mon: Didn't plan to. I'd rather take my own machine and goof off with some kickass mods... Generations Arena, for example (which we hope to have working by QuakeCon.)
shaithis: I told you, I'm not going to Quakecon because of my brother's wedding. WHY MUST YOU TORMENT ME SO?!?

If you could play in the 512-person QuakeCon tourney, where do you think you'd place? (submitted by subbie)

Answer Votes
1st, baby! I AM the illegitimate son of Thresh!
2nd, 3rd or 4th: I'm the illegitimate distant cousin of Thresh.
The top 100: I'm good, but I'm not THAT good.
The top 250: I can at least hold a respectable middle position.
Between 250th and 512th place: Hey, at least I'd place.

Mynx: Between Paul Steed and a Hooters chick.
Pappy-R: On the opposite side of the Hooters chick.
Spyke: Top 50 for sure. I could beat any of the other PQ crew one on one. Except for the Evil Lee'Mon Clone, but I think he's a bot.
Fragmaster: 7th or 511th.
Fargo: BEHIND the Hooters chick.
Hellchick: I'd place about halfway, but I'd be kicked out for calling everyone who beat me a low ping bastard.
Lee'Mon: I barely got a frag against Kornelia... what's that good for?
shaithis: I'd do well in the free for all, and then choke in my first one on one round and be destroyed. One on One is lame and boring. Free for all spamfests forever!

What happens when you think about Rocket Arena 3? (submitted by MunG)

Answer Votes
I get so excited that I begin sounding like a Dear Mynx letter.
I think, "I would sell my soul to crt just to play the private beta!"
I think, "Hey, RA3! Cool."
I never really thought about RA3 before.
I'm not a fan of RA3.
What's Rocket Arena 3?

Mynx: You should see the letters I *don't* print.
Pappy-R: This is gonna a cool kinda way.
Spyke: I think RA3 will be spooge-yourself-a-riffic.
Fragmaster: I think: "Goddamn, crt is a lazy fool and that piece of ham should have been released months ago." He has red hair, you know.
Fargo: Sorry, still dwelling on the Hooters chick.
Hellchick: I think, "crt needs to do an interview with PlanetQuake."
Lee'Mon: I think about when crt told me it'd be released, I remember that WFA is coming this weekend, and I spend the moments up until Saturday kicking the clone.
shaithis: I think "hmmm... what's the deal with these mods where you spend ninety percent of your time waiting to play being all popular?" - No offense to crt, of course, just not my thing.

Have you ever tried mapping for any of the Quake games?

Answer Votes
I've never tried mapping at all.
Yes, for Quake 1 - bring on the brown!
Yes, for Quake 2 - crates are a wonderful thing.
Yes, for Q3A - mmmmmm, curves...[Homer drool]
I've tried it for Q1 and Q2, but not Q3A.
I've tried it for Q1 and Q3A, but not Q2.
I've tried it for Q2 and Q3A, but not Q1.
I've never tried it for any of the Quake games, but I've tried it for others.

Mynx: Mental fiddled with mapping once - quad damage bags of Fritos. You think I'm kidding.
Pappy-R: Yes, but my "Insides of a Dog" series didn't do well in reviews.
Spyke: I did a bit of mapping for Q2, but nothing that I'd ever release. Think dark room with many colored lights. Cranky Steve material.
Fragmaster: Q1 and Q2, not Q3A. I only released on Quake map and it blows chunks, I don't know what I was thinking releasing that. Also eat the Wedding Rake.
Fargo: I tried mapping with Quake, and my first level, "enormous dark box with pillars," was a smash hit. My second level, "Sorta looks like my office," actually contained a shelf that could, in a heightened state of intoxication, be mistaken for a desk.
Hellchick: I started mapping with Q3A. I'm still trying to figure out how to include inflatable sheep in my maps.
Lee'Mon: I did a Doom map once... the "Hall of Mirrors" never proved to be very popular.
shaithis: I've made maps, or at least pieces of maps, for all three.

If you DID try mapping, did you ever release one?

Answer Votes
Didn't you see my last poll answer?! I said I never tried it!
Nah, I made a lot of crappy maps that I never inflicted on the public.
Yeah, I made a lot of crappy maps, and I inflicted them on the public!
I not only released a map, but it got a great review on QIC/LvL/Frib's/another map review site.
I'm Christian Antkow.

Mynx: I could never take such abuse.
Pappy-R: I said YES! Now leave me alone.
Spyke: No, I'm Christian Antkow!
Fragmaster: Goddammit, I answered that already! WHY DO YOU PAIN ME?!?!?!
Fargo: Over 100 Christian Antkow's read PlanetQuake. Whack.
Hellchick: I plan on making many crappy maps and inflicting them on the public deliberately. Beware Hellchick's House of Misaligned Textures and Epilepsy-Inducing Double Brushes, coming to a nauseating screen near you!
Lee'Mon: I would be Cranky Steve's new Erik if I released my maps.
shaithis: I had one Half-Life map that radium insists I should release because it "doesn't suck"... but that's the only map I've ever completed.

What sucks the most? (submitted by Barnak)

Answer Votes
Campers who rail.
Telefrags when you have 200 armor and 130 health with all weapons in a 1 vs. 1 at 9-9 with a fraglimit of 10.
Having someone tell you it's luck when you frag them.
Getting lagged out when you're 1 frag away from hitting the limit, and someone else nabs it first.

Mynx: Fargo!
Spyke: Railing camping quad whores on Q3DM17. That and Fargo.
Pappy-R: Power or cable outage, 4 minutes before a competitive online match. That and a weekend without a LAN.
Fragmaster: Yes, Fargo.
Hellchick: Gotta go with Fargo on this one.
Lee'Mon: Having one health and hearing GA's Doom chainsaw fire up behind you. And Fargo's holding it.
Fargo: Fargo's a little bitch.
shaithis: Let's do a little analysis. If you were telefragged at 9-9, it'd be 9-8, not 9-9. If you were telefragged after that, you would've had to kill the guy (there's only one person available to telefrag you, after all). Thus, you'd have 10-9 and the match would end first. That answer makes no sense. Oh, unless you got telefragged via teleporters and not spawning, but if that happens you're just stupid...
Hellchick: You just have to take the fun out of it, don't you, shai?


Who are these people anyway?

Hellchick is the PQ Site Director, or at least has convinced her friends that she is.
Pappy-R is PQ's News Jockey and Part-time Table Dancer.
Spyke does the PQ in Review, the PQ Mailbag, and your girlfriend.
Lee'Mon writes articles and editorials for PQ, which means he's really into finding things to complain about.
shaithis is a former PQ Site Director who now spends his days running and sharpening the spikes on the top of his cubicle. You think we're kidding.
Fragmaster also used to run PQ, and now manages and the console section of the GameSpy network. He also enjoys the occasional potted tuna.
Mynx is our resident advice expert, knowledgeable about all sorts of topics that the rest of us are just too scared to touch.
Tetsuo performs miracles that mere mortals cannot understand as part of the tech team at GameSpy. He also really likes bacon. Even more than Hellchick.
Fargo has been around since the beginning of PQ. He's been known to camp everything, including the poll.


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