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by PQ Staff
You might be a Quake newb if... [submitted by adamllis]
|you call the Railgun a "5n1p3r R1fl3"|
|grenade shrapnel is your best weapon|
|you have ever camped the shotgun|
|you think Carmack is a dating strategy|
|Jube just pweened your sorry ass! (Added by Pappy)|
Pappy-R: If your name is "Deathfromabovemonsterwithbigteeththatwilleatyourmotherandspitouthershoes666mansonhitlernazimonkey". Oh, and the name "Sniper#" is really pretty much taken! Move along.
Jube: You might be a Quake newb if... your handle is still "Player"? I
Hellchick:1f y0u c4n'7 r34d 7h1s
Mr. Lake: If you think rocket jumping is "jumping over rockets"....not that I, uh,
ever made that distinction.
What are your thoughts on PunkBuster? [submitted by JKT]
|It's merely OK.|
|It causes more problems than it solves. (laaaaag)|
|It gives those "punks" exactly what they deserve!|
|PunkBuster is a seemlessly-integrated program that makes good on every one of its promises. *hides non-descript briefcase containing large sum of money*|
|Just another means by which cold, unfeeling video game companies tighten their stranglehold on an already captive audience.|
|Ummmm, what does any of this have to do with -=BoobieS=-?|
Pappy-R: Works for me. Never had an issue and my servers use it.
Jube: It can be annoying when you're getting booted for this, that and the
other thing, but if it's keeping the cheats off the streets then amen
bruthas and sistahs!
Hellchick: I'm always up for busting punks!
Mr. Lake: I've never actually seen any "punks busted"...I think I would have more
faith in the product if the punk was spawned into a room with just maccaroni
to defend himself, while everyone on the server lays on some BFG smackdown.
You've just grabbed the flag on Q3CTF3 after destroying the defense. Do you... [submitted by PQ]
|Stop, do a little dance before exiting the room at your leisure|
|Wait for the defense to respawn so you can re-kill the machine gun totting targets|
|Run your butt on out screaming "The enemy has your flag, and is using it for a hanky!"|
|Head straight out but take your time. No sense rushing out into a rocket storm.|
|Fly outta there strafe jumping like a bunny on Bawls!|
|I've never actually seen the enemy flag myself...|
Pappy-R: OK, that settles it. Hellchick is never getting my flag.
Jube: If I've somehow managed to get the flag then I'm running as fast as
Lucy's fat little legs can carry me. No time for the pwnage dance here boy's
Hellchick: Stop, do a little dance, then blow my nose on the flag and shout,
"neener neener neener."
Mr. Lake: ...legend has it that the enemy flag is the yin to your yang.
Do video games cause violent behaviour? [submitted by PQ]
|Yes: I'm always on the lookout for cartoon opponents at the mall.|
|Yes: I gib my dinner before eating it.|
|Yes: Only well adjusted adults should be allowed play, while the kids clean the house and get jobs.|
|Yes: That Pacman is one evil mofo!|
|Yes: I often make my Sims pee themselves and have sex with the neighbors.|
|No: Blaming games for violence is a crap excuse for poor parenting.|
Pappy-R: /me slaps this question around with one stanky ass old hunk of trout.
Jube: I've done a lot more than just make my Sims pee themselves, so yup...
games = evil. Honestly your honor, video games made me do it!
Hellchick: I hate people who say that video games cause violent behavior and
I WANT TO KILL THEM!
Mr. Lake: Violent? No. Childish? Definately.
When slumming in counterstrike servers, I like to call the other players: [submitted by !FT!Marauder]
|N00b, cause I'm a l33t hax0r, d00d!|
|Counterstrike players. That's insult enough, isn't it? |
|It's a trick! I'll never admit I play CS secretly late at night!|
|I am polite as can be, and... YOU SHOT ME YOU LITTLE (*$(@*&!!!!! counterwhat?|
|I don't play Counterstrike, I still have my soul.|
Pappy-R: To quote one of my all time favourite "Poll comments" from our founder, Mark "The Freshmaker" Surfas..."Bitch please!"
Jube: Uhm, Marauder... shouldn't you be busy supervising that purple
underwear wearing CS player who hangs out in your store?
Hellchick: Counter...strike...? (looks confused)
Mr. Lake: ...Counterstrike? Is that the one where you fight agains the supermarket
Should PlanetQuake get into a little Shoutcasting? Tunes, talk, frags? [submitted by PQ]
|Hell yeah! Gibalicious audio!|
|Well, kinda maybe sorta|
|Not so much, no|
|First time ya play Tesh, ya die. Deal?|
|Let's give it a go cap'n!|
Pappy-R: /me gets ready to hit the big power switch on the wall
Jube: As long as none of the PQ staff will be singing then I be down with
Hellchick: Hells yeah! I'm an old school shoutcaster from the days of the
Mr. Lake: Ah, the "Mr. Lake Talk Show"...featuring ...well... ok, I can do a few
impressions but beyond that I got nothing. :(
Pappy-R is the PlanetQuake Site Director and ensures that all the coolness on PQ that happens, happens.
Who are these people, anyway?
Jube runs the morning shift around here, and posts more news before 9 am than most people do all day. She's also the mystic mind behind the Quake Scopes!
Hellchick gave up a promising career in astrophysics to make a job out of Quake. She also holds the GameSpy record for "most inflatable sheep named Pearl."
Mr. Lake is the creative director over at Lake's Digital Arts and level designer at the truely funky game house, Gray Matter Studios.