PQ in Review
Spyke recaps last week and all the things you may have missed!
PQ In Review: Episode 8 - The Merchandising Contracts
Well, well, well. You never thought it, did you? This is the eighth weekly episode of the great bastion of online multiplayer entertainment news that is PQ In Review. That means I've been doing this for two whole months now, folks, and I've come to enjoy it even more than when I first started. Hopefully this will lead to bigger and better things, like a job that actually pays me. Don't get me wrong though, I love this and will keep doing it as long as I am mentally unstable enough to do so. As a response to my whining of last week, a lot of people e-mailed me, either threatening me, or thanking me for all the work I've done, or asking me if PQ readers have Attention Deficit Dis.. Hey! Let's go play outside!
Again, a spectacular week, filled with oh-so-yummy content, as Lowtax shows off his myriad skillz; we had both the
first and second
episodes of a spectacular new feature, Interactive PlanetQuake! Designed to entertain and waste time, IPQ is a fun, mad-lib type thing, that so far has let you create both your own Daikatana review, and your very own Planet site! As far as the infamous Mod of the Week goes, this week, we had a whole ton of them! Yes, this past week was the Mod Expo, highlighting a bunch of spectacular mods hosted here at PQ, and letting you, the fans, play them on PQ servers, and chat with the developers! It ran somewhat smoothly,
and fun was had by all, so hopefully we'll see the sequel sometime in the future.. During the Mod Expo, on Wednesday to be specific, the Blast Chamber demo was released; it looks to be a spectacular mod, kudos (I have no idea
what "kudos" means, but it sounds good) to the whole team! The
Model of the Week, Ogro was unveiled; as always, it's high quality and cool lookin', kind of a retro/Quake 1 feel to it. For the third week in a row, which must be some kind of record, our esteemed leader delivered the PQ Poll, chock full of interesting questions that are not funny at all. It was a two-editorial week here, as we had.. um.. two great editorials. The first was a piece by Brian Forsyth on The Woes of Being a Multi-Gamer, and the second was a
rebuttal to Essobie's Grapple editorial by Andrew. Both are great reads and uphold the time-honored standards of PQ (yeah, right). Wow, a lot of news here, and still more to go! LadyICE delivered the mailbag again this week, with loads of letters from our always so clever and interesting readers. With letters from our stupid and boring readers, Lowtax showed us more
Stupid Crap People Have Sent Him, getting his jollies insulting people like the anti-social psychopath he is. This week, Mynx encounters and confronts genital wetness, studliness, and showering teenagers in the always-freaky, ever-so-sneaky
Dear Mynx! Stepping away from the freakiness that is PlanetQuake, and back to, well, Quake, Slashdot, the pinnacle of nerdliness,
interviewed the God of programming, John Carmack, asking him loads of cool questions about himself, Quake, and programming in general. This stuff is gospel for geeks like me, so check it out! As always, we had some terrific Levels of
the Week, highlighting the very best of the mapping community; I can say one thing about this, and that is that the Q2 DM map of the week, Neurotic Serenity, is one of the best maps I've seen in a long time. Get it now, dammit! The site that bears no similarity to The Onion, The Smoking Gun, made an update this week, where they rip the entire gaming community to shreds, as always. The coolest site devoted to models on the internet (not those kinds of models, you perverts),
Q2PMP had an entire spotlight
at Gamespy.com devoted to them! As is anything from PQ, it's pretty nifty, so check it out, while you can. Not that it's going away or anything, just that I'm running out of interesting endings for sentences. And finally, last but never least, we have a new pair of hosted sites here at the Planet! The 6th Floor - Point Blank Reviews is dedicated to reviewing all that is good (and, conversely, bad) in Action Quake 2 mapping. Odd Maps offers some,
well, really odd maps! Both are churnin' out content, so go give them a hearty handshake full of bandwidth! That's it for the news, thank goodness.. Now I can get back to being cynical.
Well golly gee, so much stuff happened this week, including that great earthquake, that Lowtax is burnt out. Well, he's burnt out every week, but next week we won't whip him as hard. Stuff to expect next week: a model pack from PQ and the guys I mention at least twice every week because they're just so amazing, Q2PMP; the weekly sections, including the Mod of the Week, Levels of the Week, Poll (maybe) and Mailbag; and finally, the spawn of Satan taking over PlanetQuake. And maybe, just maybe, I might return to being funny again.
Question of the Damned
Hrm. The QotD this week kinda sucks, in my opinion, but that's only because I made it up on the spot while I was chiseling the tablet I had to send to the generous people who answer it. Send in more questions! Now I know how Lowtax feels about the poll. Well, making up for the fact that it's a terrible question is the fact that more people are answering it now. This week, we have the special guest addition of Hellchick, and.. me! This week's question is: "What's the coolest thing that has ever happened at PlanetQuake, in your opinion?"
I think the coolest thing that ever happened was when John Romero gave his hair-care tips to Dear Mynx. Check it out: John Romero's ten-step daily haircare ritual, laid bare! Brilliance!
The coolest thing that ever happened at Planetquake was Lowtax's arrival just in time to take the Rail-trail contest off my hands (and thus save my sanity, at the cost of his. Muahahahaha!)
"Easy. The day PQ hired me. Is there any doubt?"
Special Guest Hellchick:
The coolest thing that has ever happened at Planetquake was just last week, when I was visiting the Gamespy offices. Lowtax and I decided that as a special treat for all the PQ readers, we would fire up his webcam, get buck naked, dance wildly around the GameSpy offices, perform sacred rituals to summon Tahitian deities that would bestow grand and wonderful gifts on the PQ populace, and then wind the whole party up with a ripping rendition of the Bee Gee's "Stayin' Alive". Of course, this was at 4 am, so few people saw it. And if Lowtax tells you that he doesn't remember any of it, he's lying and possibly drunk.
Um.. me? No, no, it's not my own personal forum.
The Mod Expo ranks up there, as does the Beatdown,
although I've never been to one. Oooh, I know! The shortlived-but-hopefully-it's-coming-back
Friday Frag! That was the coolest thing to listen to, except for the FLA, and it had ranting
and Quake, two of the bestest things in the world!
[Editor's Note: That was pathetic, we'll make sure he comes up with a better answer next week.]
Spyke's Profound Thought
Again, I'd like to thank everyone who wrote in for doing so. E-mail is much appreciated. I was encouraged to make these thoughts more profound, so I'll try to. Does time exist? If you read Slashdot then you'll know about this one already. If it doesn't, then this article isn't late, and I'm going to get up early tomorrow morning. Time is relative. Do informative newsgroups still exist? I read them purely for entertainment now. Can anyone else not wait to see John Carmack's virtual worlds? How much does the new NIN album rule? Thanks everyone, for making these past two months a blast. Let's see if we can do two more months, and two more months, and so on, and so on.. If you like (I won't whine this time),
drop me an e-mail. See y'all next week!