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    Quake DeveLS

    Top 49 Things To Do To The Domain Name Squatter

    Kindly submitted by :
    DUBBS, Ravvy, ashleys, nematode1, Ominia, Francis Fearon, Cerberus, ZeroDivide and RYCHE !

      #49 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • Force the owners of to sit and watch endless hours of Barney
    • Send them countless emails with information about Quake 3
    • Email them tons of copies of O.J Simpson trial avi.s
    • Hack their site and post up xeroed/scanned copies of your ass
    • Force the webmasters of to watch My Little Pony shows
    • Tell them they should post some Good pics on their site
    • Ask if they deliver
    • Scramble their brains into thinking they are your slaves
    • Whip out your "paintguns" and "redecorate" their site.
    • Send them this list
    • Make some kind of rendering of him in Quake 3 for us to destroy.
    • Add him to a ton of SPAM lists
    • Write a virus that floods his domain and slows down his connection
    • Hack and rewrite his page into something useful...
    • send him one big e-mail message, like 2,000,000,000,000 lines long of repeating 'Stupid Squatter' messages so he gets hung up in the download...
    • Death by lethal explosion
    • 50mb Email bomb of mating rhinos
    • hack and 're-direct' it to
    • if the guys into porn so much, how bout we post his email address on a gay sex newsgroup (hehe nasty) along the lines of: sad man, needs manly comfort and loving, likes shaved men :)
    • I could always post him them pictures of his mum? hehehehe
    • get the bastard in real life and nail his tongue to his foot (just a parting gesture like :))
    • Spread rumours that actually stands for: Quite.Unnatural.And.Kooky.Evil.Communists.
    • Suggest to the remaining strogg that this guy thinks they wear dresses.
    • Send attachments of all mail addressed to id to (gee, I thought this site was about quake, sorry about the 5000 messages a day.)
    • At last! Snipers are welcome! Haul your ass over to this guy's house and do what you do best.
    • Arrange a meeting for him with President Clinton in the oval office.
    • Make agreement with Microsoft and Netscape that all future browsers cannot access
    • Just shoot the prick.
    • Ignore them (e.g.,, instead of, etc.), and,
    • Talk about them behind their back (e.g. usenet posts " sucks", "Virus found on", "Pam vids and hot kiddie pr0n at", etc.)
    • Make him play a "special" version of q2 where his only weapon is the hand blaster.
    • He never is allowed to have a gl version of q2 or any id product.
    • Sishkobobing comes to mind....
    • Send em cans of spam.
    • (CTF Specific :) Use his genitila as a grapple point....
    • (CTF Specific :) Plant the flag in his genitila....
    • I say we hunt their asses down, strap them in restraining chairs with a tv infront of it... then using those eyebrow clippy thingies (like in Clockwork Orange) keep his eyes open. Now on the tv play rerun's of the carebears and barney while playing the quake2 soundtrack in the background....
    • Same as above with hunting their asses down, but this time take them to a lan party and pull the cables on the lan. When everyone goes berserk blame the losers instead :)
    • cut one of his arms off, then leave him hanging by his only arm to the edge of a cliff while you tickle his ass with a very itchy feather.
    • Force him to take a shower
    • Tell him you'd like to meet all of his friends
    • Trash his collection of Star Wars figurines
    • Block out the Sci-Fi and Playboy channels on his TV
    • Dispose of his pocket protector
    • Expose him to sunlight
    • Make the inside of his underwear inaccessible to his hands
    • Hand him a mirror
    • Install Surf-Watch on his computer
    • Ask Zoid to create a new mode in Quake3 called "Capture the quake3 loser". Curiously, if this is played over TCP/IP, packets get sent to the "master server" at

      #5 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • Sue the guy (Ultima Online style) for false representation. "Unless those girls are crackwhores, and I can shoot 'em, I want my money back!"

      #4 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • If Quake3 is a copyrighted name have ID sue him for infringment... ;-)

      #3 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • Attach him to the Anti-porn on the Net campaign's mailing list...

      #2 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • Tell him the Nude-Raider code just before you crack his Tomb Raider CD

      #1 Thing To Do To The Domain Name Squatter :

    • Ask John Carmack to rename the game Doom3.


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