Ready for another tour of the PQ reader mail? If so, you've certainly come to the right place. Dire Hamster, the perennial mailbag sidekick, has joined forces with me once more to assist in confounding and confusing the enemies of literacy and sanity - namely, the PQ readers. Get ready for some fun.
The question of the moment - what's your favorite Quake mod? Unfortunately, I can't say there were any real surprises here.
From: "Marko Permanto"
Subject: My favourite mod
I'm not entirely sure if I should do this, writing to you guys that is. It
takes a special kind of courage to send a mail to you, when you know how you
treat people for their mails. I cannot deny that I have had several laughs
when reading the mailbag, but why do you even bother to answer to some
mails? Is it for the pure reason that they are so easy to come up fun stuff
for, or that you don't have enough sensible mails? Anyhow, over to the
actual subject. Hmm, my favourite mod you say? That's a hard pick, after
playing so many fantastic mods. At the moment my favourite mod is the mod
that ships with the Darkplaces engine for Quake, made by Lordhavoc. I also
like Rocket 3 Arena for Q3A very much. Another favourite is the Nighthunters
mod for Quake 2. As you can see I like all Quakes just as much, and I wish
others could do so as well. Criticizing any of the Quakes is to criticize
id, and id is the greatest game developing company, right? After all, the
mod I have had most fun with must be Team Fortress for Quake. I played it at
school with my friends, and the joy was at it's top when you ran past the
enemys defense of Heavy weapons specialists as a simple scout, grabbed the
flag and got back home, more or less unharmed. Or maybe when you were
assigned as the leader of the team, and shouted to people that sat at a
computer on the other side of the room to do different things and so on.
Then later on regretting those actions, since the enemy sat in the same
room, and heard all the orders.
- ImUnreal (yes that is my nickname)
a madman: Now, this email contains a blatant misconception that I would like to clear up right now. We do not, in fact, simply pick on everyone that writes in to the mailbag. We only tear apart the letters that are stupid. Or are poorly written, or written by people we don't like...
Dire Hamster: Or are written by people with "Unreal" in their name. Grr!
a madman: ...or are about how the QuakeScopes have changed someone's life.
Dire Hamster: I think that pretty much falls into the "stupid" category, though.
a madman: Well, whatever. Anyway, the lack of high-quality mail does factor into the equation as well. Quantity over quality... it's The American Way!
Dire Hamster: You know, I remember the days when I was one of the the only people I knew who knew anything at all about computers. People were always buying computers and then telling me things like "I was going to do something, but I was afraid that I was going to delete everything on my computer." I really miss those days.
Those people have not gotten any smarter in the days since, but computers have, unfortunately, gotten easier to use. My plea to companies such as AOL: "Damnit, stop enabling these people!"
a madman: On the bright side, that does mean there are more helpless victims for my online rampages. If only intelligent people knew how to play a game of Quake 3, there might be some real competition out there. But that's all beside the point - we were originally talking about the letter, were we not? Glad to see you have good taste when it comes to picking mods, though I'm not personally familiar with Nighthunters.
From: "Anthony Hubbert"
Subject: Favourite Quake Mod of All Time...
I'd have to say that my favourite Quake mod is Zerstorer. It was so
goddamned moody and disturbing. Besides, it showed the engine was not only
good at multiplayer.
Quake Rally was pretty cool too, as well as AirQuake. If you can't tell,
I'm a sucker for the Classic, Original and Almighty Quake.
ChaosDM would take the cake for Quake2, and I don't care about Q3A, so I
wouldn't know what to choose there.
Keep up the mailbaggy goodness,
a madman: Ahh, Zerstörer... king of the old-school single-player mods. Good stuff. "True Love Waits" still has my vote for coolest level ever. I never was a huge fan of Quake Rally or AirQuake, but they were interesting from a coder's standpoint.
Dire Hamster: You know, that's one of the things I miss about the days of Quake 1. When Q1 was new it seemed like there were infinite possibilities. Now it seems like people are less willing to take chances. Surely not every possible permutation of modifications has been made, so is it really necessary to port Team Fortress to every imaginable platform?
a madman: Hey, did you hear about Battlefield 1942 TF and TF Myth? But really, we could debate this for ages and never come to a conclusion on this one. I'm going to say that it's probably a Jungian thing - Team Fortress is actually a racial memory that expresses itself in our game modifications. It's part of our collective unconscious, man!
Dire Hamster: That's about the eighth-stupidest thing I've ever heard - but it would explain Team Fortress Serious Sam 2.
a madman: Or maybe people just like adding the word "Fortress" to things. But please, game developers - add a "fortress" modification out of the box, so the mod community can more on to more creative things. Like porting AirQuake to every conceivable engine.
Hmm... AirBattlefield 1942. It just might work...
From: "Matthew 'Gleeb' Garnett-Frizelle"
Subject: Last Week's Mailbag...
I have 2 points:
1) Confused Us is SO right, give us back the poll!
2) Best mod for any Quake? GQ, available at http://www.planetquake.com/gzone/gq.shtml
Please doesn't think I'm biased :P
a madman: You know, I can't think of anything amusing to say about this letter. Not only is it fairly uninteresting, it's impossible to respond to in an amusing manner.
Congratulations, Gleeb, you just broke the mailbag.
Dire Hamster: Gotta love those mailbag product placements, though. "Today's mailbag was brought to you by the letter 'A' and rich, creamy Smack!"
a madman: That's the kind of humor you can only find at the PQ Mailbag, brought to you each week by PlanetQuake - the Place for All Things Quake!
Dire Hamster: You sicken me.
Next: More mail awaits you on the next page!