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Dear
Mynx

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    PlanetQuake | Features | Dear Mynx | Dear KillCreek
   

Got problems with your girlfriend because she can't take your constant Quake playing? Are you finding yourself just a little too attracted to the game models? Then talk to Mynx and she'll sort it all out for you!

This Week:  Mynx is still missing in action, so we've recruited the one and only Stevie "KillCreek" Case, level designer for Ion Storm, to answer those questions only women of the world can answer! That said, take it away, Stevie!


Hi Mynx, please disguise my name should you ever choose to print this question. :-)

Anyway, I have a somewhat serious question to ask. I have been dating a girl for almost a year and birth control has been an ongoing problem with us. I go limp almost instantly when I put on a rubber, but I don't want her to take "the pill" as I've heard too many stories about how it affects your body and metabolism. I don't want her to have to suffer just so I can enjoy sex more.

That doesn't leave many options and I've heard vasectomies are both reversible and relatively painless. Can a vasectomy be reversed? Are there any side effects? I really want to make my woman happy and wouldn't hesitate for a minute to snip the ol' plumbing if I knew it would make our sex better and had no negative long-term effects. Can you shed any light?

-Snip n' Clip

My dearest Snip n' Clip,

Let me begin by saying that I do admire your desire to please your chica and also prevent pregnancy. That aside, I think this whole idea needs a bit more thought. I hope after you wrote this letter you has some sort of epiphany realized you were taking about having a doc cut into your rumbly bag with a scalpel and slice your vas deferens. This is not something to be taken lightly. Although it is possible to splice the tubes back together in many cases, your chances of regaining the ability to make babies decreases the longer you wait. There are also cases in which a reversal does not work at all. To begin with, get that girl on the pill! Some women notice some slight changes once they start, others don't. She can always stop taking it if she has a problem, and swallowing pills doesn't require the slicing of any sensitive areas (this is a good thing :).

There is one thing you seem to be overlooking that concerns me, however. Neither a vasectomy nor the pill will protect you from AIDS or other STDs. This is serious sh10t that you do not want. Many of these nasties have few or delayed symptoms, so by all means go to the doctor and get tested. Making sure your sausage slamming doesn't lead to death or mutilation should be priority #1. If you do not like the pill, you can always check out the myriad of goodies available to protect you including: female condoms, diaphragms, spermicidal foam, or she can get once monthly depo-provera shots. Do not be afraid to ask your doctor about your options before you consider slicing the baby tubes!

Hey. I've written you a few times before and I was wondering if you could answer my question. I'm not going to delve into the details because this is probably THE biggest guy question...other than the guy with the huge twanger e-mailing in to ask if his piece is satisfactory. But let's just say, I've always been the "nice guy", ya'know? That's why it's been no problem hooking up some net.love.

However, in the last couple years I've become more of a combination case. I've totally went from the nerdy "nice guy" to someone with a more "leftist" stance/appearance/etc. (anarchism, anyone?) I'm not going to brag to you about how "punk-rock" i am, but let's just say that I act a lot different, I look a lot different, (purple devilock? Leather jacket? Hot-Ass bondage pants? Think sex pistols here.) and I believe in VERY different things. My friends tell me I have a reputation for being someone who does his own thing and doesn't back down. Well, not that I had an alterior motive, but I figured maybe this would raise my standing with the chick-folk a bit. However, I've noticed that most, if not all, of the girls at my school and in my town are the "Oh, he looks so handsome in his 300 dollar rented tuxedo, I'm going to marry him and have 90 of his babies." type. This is something that leaves both the "nice guy" and the "punk kid" out of the picture, as I've never been on the varsity basketball team, I've never work abercrombie and fitch clothes, I don't listen to eminem or watch MTV, etc.

This is probably more of a rhetorical/"cry for help" question that is asked all the time, and it doesn't matter much at all, but what are my odds of finding a punk-rock chick with something in common, or at least an ordinary girl who digs this kind of thing? 

-Spunkin' Punk

Dear Spunkin' Punk,

The answer is very simple, and often overlooked. It is way too easy to over-think these issues. You must do as the punk girls do! Chances are if you are still in high school, live in a relatively small town, or just hang out at home the world might seem like it is full of the "90 babies" variety of chicks. In reality, there are bunches of honeys out there that share your interests and want to get to know you. It is your job to find them! Stop thinking and planning, and start doing. Here is your homework for the week:

1) Make a list of everything you find interesting and like to do
2) Make a list of everything you want in a chick, and what her interests should be
3) Make another list of all the places someone interested in that sort of stuff might be found.

I am not kidding. Write your lists on actual paper! You and she like comics? Go to a convention or hang out at the comic book store. You want a gal who is into your favorite band? Find a concert in a nearby city and go to it! You have an interest in politics? Volunteer for a campaign. If you are into sports you could take a kung fu class or join a local weekend sports league. The possibilities are endless. There are classes and clubs out there for people interested in anything and everything. Check your local papers for cool things to see and do. Make yours lists, compare them, and promise yourself to go out and do something on your list each week. Get out there. She is waiting!

Dear Mynx

my girl friend want to have a 3 some with me and her dad
and her dad ok with it
she said it's not the first
i love her and don't want to hurt her
what should i do?

-Daddy's Milk

Oh dear Daddy's Milk,

Run. Fast. Run away. Any woman who thinks sex with her father is normal has issues. Say it with me: I - S - S - U - E - S. Often this sort of activity is indicative of abuse as a child. If you really, truly love her then you will encourage her to get help from a professional therapist. Engaging in this sort of often-illegal activity - especially if she is underage - will only make her problems worse.

Sharing your meatspear with daddy-san is not something you will want to keep on your sexual resume. There are many women in the world that would gladly rock your stock without the suggestion of incest. Tell this chicky that you love her, but incest just isn't your gig.

Dear Mynx -
I'm sixteen and a sophomore in highschool, and I'm sort of an outcast at school because I'm the only girl in all my classes that plays Q3A. Anyway despite the fact that alot of guys in all my classes play Q3, I've never had a date or anything!! All the other girls and even alot of the guys call me a slut, a few of them know me as "that quake slut" or whatever. They say I just look to slutty to ever be a respectable woman, one girl said it was because my chest was too big for the rest of me.
Mynx, what is too big?? I've never had implants or anything, I'm a 34DD and five foot four, and pretty thin. I don't get it! I thought guys liked that look?? Most guys won't even talk to me because I'm known as a geek around school! Is there any way I can change my image or do something different that will help?

-Curvy

Dear Curvy,

Honey, I know of what you speak. Let me begin by saying that high school is an evil place for chicas like you who are not 'normal.' I have fond memories of being called a "feminazi gorilla" by some of my kinder colleagues in school because I liked video games and considered myself a strong, opinionated woman. The good news is that this will pass. The bad news is that it probably won't happen until you get out of high school. The kids that make fun of you only do so out of their own fears and insecurity.

You have a few options. You can go the image change route, which can be fun if you are into it. J If you don't want to look or act differently, keep you head down and do the things you enjoy most. Lots of guys (and some women) do like the look you described quite a bit! Once you graduate you will move into a wonderful new world, and I think you will find it much more inviting. Stick with the things you love and good people with similar interests are bound to track you down.

mynx mynx mynx...
just the name alone makes me shivver at the sound of a goddess, omniknowledgable and omniintelligent...

allright, before i swallow my food, i just want to ask you one silly little question.. i know most people ask you about sex, and geeks, and sex and geeks, and maybe geeks and sex, and of course quake... but i want to ask you about HICKIES.... whats a hickey???? what happenes when someone gives someone a hickey??? its bugging me very much please tell me what it is :((

-SuckySucky

Dear SuckySucky,

hickˇey, n., pl. hickˇeys. Informal 2. a. A reddish mark on the skin caused by kissing, biting, or sucking, as in lovemaking.

My friend, a hickey is one of those neat little red marks that show up on one's skin after a round of what your parents might call "necking." Most often you will notice these red/purple spots on the necks of your eager classmates. The long and short of it is that a hickey occurs when the sucker sucks hard enough on the suckee's skin to break some of the tiny blood vessels below the surface. Although the neck is most visible hickey habitat, they have been known to migrate to the lower nether-regions and inner thighs. I like to think of them as a nice little tag that says "taken" to anyone who might think of sucking on my target!

Dear Mynx?

I have a problem like every one elts has. you see im only 15 never had a girl friend, all ways to scared to ask them out or tell them there hot or some thing? and there's this very good looking girl in my class and I don't know what to do? if I do ask her out, wtf do I do then?? I can't drive or any thing? im too damn scared to tell her that she is hot!!! Help!

-Baby Boy

Dear Baby Boy,

No need to worry little man. Everyone was in your shoes once, and I am sure the hottie is just as afraid as you are. The first thing to think about is that there are few things more attractive than confidence. The key the coming across well is convincing yourself that no matter how the girly responds, you will walk away a bigger man for the effort. You could start out with small compliments.. just make sure they don't sound fake! Pick out something you like about her - her hair, a piece of clothing she is wearing - and compliment her on it. Often one nice comment will easily lead into a conversation. Get to know her a bit. Ask her to help you with your homework or to study together if she seems to dig your chili. You can worry about asking her out later.

Not being able to drive should not get in the way of seeing her once the time comes. Invite her over to your house to work on homework or to swim if you have a pool. If she has no way to get there you can have your dad drop you off to meet her somewhere (I recommend dad over mom for this operation). I would bet she will need a ride as well, so she won't look down on your lack of wheels.

Whatever you do, just don't come on too strong. There is a fine line between confidence and a jerk! Say something nice to her that you really mean. Talking to her will come naturally after the ice has been broken. Happy hunting!


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