Got problems with your girlfriend because she can't take
your constant Quake playing? Are you finding yourself just
a little too attracted to the game models? Then talk
to Mynx and she'll sort it all out for you!
Week: Efnet #quake does Dear Mynx! This week I open
the floodgates and offer up your questions to the folks
that made me what I am today (so blame them)!
I've got a little
question. Do all women like to pop zits on their
men? Every single girl I ever dated, all the way up to
my wife, gleefully popped any zit they could find.
Sometimes, my wife even gets mad if she finds out I popped one
without giving her a crack at it first. Is this a common
female compulsion, or do
I just attract weird women?
* Zanshin jumps around and enjoys his jiggling genitals
CheezH: I am SO not qualified to answer that question
Moneo: I think the real answer there is that popping zits is fun. Chicks are just trying to take all the fun out of the lives of men.
RevZOOT: well, I love to pop zits on my chicks
DemonEatr: Yes, you attract weird girls. Mine doesn't do that for *me*. She makes me do it for her though.
c4: Rule #1) Do not EVER try to make sense of women. After many years of study, I think I've finally figured them out. Answer - You can't figure them out. They do odd things. Perhaps it's a lack of OTHER explosions of goo that she craves. Give her more attention of a bonerific nature and see what happens.
dg-: Ummm.. as a girl my answer is NO. I do not take pleasure in causing men pain, or milking ooze out of anyplace other than their shlongs.
mynx: What you guys have to understand is the female obsession with goo. We like to squeeze things and watch the goo come out. For the record though, I do take pleasure in causing men pain. Often!
Mynx, what the hell is up with girls?!
Seriously, my girl and I banged it twice, and then she decided
it was bad for her to bang it, religiously and all, then she
justified it somehow for herself so we continued to bang it, 5
more times, and then she said again, no more banging. But she
and I continued to go at it orally and all, that was cool with
me, and it seemed to be cool with her. Then suddenly, she
wanted to have sex again but I said no because I knew she
would feel guilt and I would too. We continued to oral for a
little longer and then recently she has completley stopped
everything with me. EVEN KISSING!! I can barely touch her. She
has compeltley lost interest in relationships and stuff like
that. I guess I have many questions:
2)Is she going to hell?
3)Why is she so
4)What do I do if suddenly she wants to bang
5)Why has she lost interest in
6)Is she a lesbian?
Ok thanks Mynx...please help me out here! Oh yeah, I'd like to give
a shout out
to Kool and the Gang.
DemonEatr: 1) All women are crazy 2) If we go to hell for sex... who cares, it's worth it 3) Because she's a woman 4) before you attack her, wrap your whacker
Moneo: What are they banging here? I don't follow.
CheezH: don't date religious chicks unless there is a 100% chance you can corrupt them into a jizz-guzzling fiend
dg-: I would question how old she is. It could be very likely her animosity about ex, relationships, etc is due to the fact that she is probably young and not fully prepared for the complex issues that are raised when sex comes into the picture.
Mustang|: 1) YES, IDIOT 2) I don't know, but you should try your best 3) See #1 4) "Trojan Maaaaan!" 5) God is the worst thing that can happen to a horny girl 6) No. 7) No comment
c4: Religion is a form of control based upon guilt and fear, rarely using fact or substance to prove a point. Thanks to our dear and soon to be departed President Willie, it is now a fact of law that playing the skin flute is NOT a sexual act.. so play on.
mynx: This girl quite clearly wants to be a total donghound, but she wrestles with a battle of good (read: dong) vs. evil (I'm going to hell for this). Reassure her that Jesus (hay-zeus) loves her no matter what, and then get your girl on.
Ok....My friend is
gay. We will call him "Brandon". He likes to walk into other
guys "accidently" to touch their um.....things. he talks about touching asses together. How do I know he is gay?? I dont. He just does things that will make me THINK he is gay. And I dont feel comfortable around him.
-Rubbed the wrong way
RevZOOT: make sure you don't drop your soap
c4: Just because your friend "Brandon" likes the sausage doesn't mean he wants YOUR sausage. Get over it.
Zanshin: hahahah this guy sounds more confused about this than his "friend".. I think he's looking for some nice hot dong himself
c4: Then again.. maybe your friend wants your little single shot pants pistol. Tell him you're not interested and be done with it.
mynx: I can't decide what makes you uncomfortable... having your wang touched, or liking it? If you think he wants you, just politely decline. Say, "I am sorry, my yogurt drinking friend, but I just donut swing that way. If I did, I am sure I'd find you quite delicious!" and then move on.
think its a given that you kick ass, so i'll forego the ass
kissing. I have this problem where my 'purple helmeted warrior
of love' bends downward when fully at attention. Its not like
the whole thing just points down, but it starts out normal and
straight, and then proceeds to curve downward, as if his
helmet is too heavy and overcome by gravity. (But its not
gravity. When its not fully at attention its pretty straight).
I've never done the deed before, and i'm concerned
that this could be a problem?
I mean, i've seen my share of pr0n, and cpt winkie always seems to
be pretty straight, or sometimes bent upwards a little, not at all
like mine. Am i defective?????
RevZOOT: apparently they put his penis on backwards. He could probably be a pr0n star
Mustang|: I dunno, god knows what kind of horrid deformed dongs are out there, if it hurts him or something he should see a doctor
mynx: I've seen some pretty oddly shaped wangs in my day, and I can't say they've ever really posed a serious health threat but hey, you'd do fine from behind!
DemonEatr: Just bang her from behind
RevZOOT: like, could he have sex while facing in the wrong direction?
c4: Hit it from behind.. she'll thank you when she regains conciousness.
RevZOOT: like, while facing backwards, or on a bed with his head at her feet
* mynx enjoys watching RevZoot try towork out the mechanics of actual S-E-X in his head
RevZOOT: well from what I understand you usually don't do that BACKWARDS
RevZOOT: i mean this could be a total original pr0n
RevZOOT: lots of money there
RevZOOT: oh god
mynx: Obviously, RevZoot is a virgin. But, hey! He's on the right track! Don't worry, your pee pee stick will be fine... you may just have to be a little creative.
I'll make this short: Mynx, is sex overrated?
RevZOOT: not that i'd know ... but my guess is No
CheezH: I am never too tired to masturbate
CheezH: and what my prostate wants, my prostate gets
c4: Sex is totally overrated.. I put it WAY down the list behind things like food, sleep, work. Course.. if I was having sex, I wouldn't be sleeping. So that makes it behind work, and food. Then again.. if I'm having sex.. I'm not working. But still.. sex is overrated. It's behind food on my list. Although.. if I'm not working, I don't have any money for food.. so basically.. no.. Sex is not overrated. Simple!
mynx: I'll make my answer short: No.
I 0wn j00
I happened to catch
my husband playing Q3A the other day, and he was playing as
YOU. The mynx player, with "Mynxie" as the name, and he
was pretending to be you on servers. What the hell
should I make of this, hum? Would he have some secret
desire to be female? What should I do? :(?
aechdee: buy him some panties
CheezH: it's sort of like role playing (like I have to explain this)
Mustang|: BE the mynx
CheezH: and as far as name, he's probably just very unoriginal
CheezH: also, there are worse things to find your husband doing on the computar
dg-: I would say its a little 'odd' but fairly harmless... unless of course its a cry for help, or a behavior that he will slowly step up till he is wearing your heels and lipstick and singing showtunes.
c4: We all aspire to be Mynxen.. only the brave admit it. At least he's not wearing your underwear, pretending to be you.
RevZOOT: it's my experience that most people who play as mynx using her nick ... um
dg-: c4 is right.. who wouldnt want to be mynx
c4: If I were Mynx.. I'd have HYOOOOGE boobage.. and never leave the house
mynx: I think I am going to go with Cheez, here. Mynx The Bot(tm) is already there, already has a name, just ready to go. It was probably easier than thinking up a new name. Now, if he was actually saying things like "EYE YAM DEAR MYNIX AND I HAVE BIG PRETTY BOOBAY", well.. that's something else entirely.
I had to take a cross country
flight and while I was at the airport I poked around the
bookstore hoping to find something. I came across the new
Thomas Harris novel, Hannibal, in the best seller section. The
cover-art was pretty cool so I pick it up and looked at it.
It's about the continuing saga of Dr Hannibal "The Cannibal"
Lecter from The Silence of the Lambs. It was a great book and
it took me only 5 days to read it. But the problem is I seem
to have been brainwashed perhaps by Hannibal's enjoyment of
cannibalism. I would actually like to try eating human flesh
and perhaps a liver (with fava beans of course) What Should I
do? No one sells "human" in the deli section in the
RevZOOT: you can mail order that stuff
RevZOOT: customs are a bitch though
mynx: I'm pretty sure it's not illegal to cut yourself up though, is it?
CheezH: um... maybe if someone donated their body to science and he ate it in the name of science?
mynx: like, you could take a flank outta your side and survive
dg-: professional help, or at least read a nice book on veganism and see if he isnt just too influenced by literature :P
CheezH: maybe that's what happened to those quadruple amputee guys
DemonEatr: nobody with half a brain should ever have been influenced by this total PIECE OF CRAP of a book. It's the worst novel I've read since the DOOM books.
RevZOOT: GET BACK HERE, I'LL BITE YER LEGS OFF
RevZOOT: i might suggest the morgue
RevZOOT: take genitals. dip in water. freeze. eat your Testicles.
mynx: Hey, now that you mention it, there is some website out there with a guy removing his own testicles and eating them
RevZOOT: you can only do that twice
CheezH: that's all I have to say about that
dg-: certainly. I dont wish to work at Mc Donalds, or worse yet be served there.
mynx: there are some logistical problems with the morgue
mynx: shouldn't we be just saying NO
mynx: PLEASE TO NOT BE EATING MY FLESH
mynx: unless otherwise specified
RevZOOT: #quake is one place you can ask for cannibalistic dinner suggestions and ... get them