Got problems with your girlfriend because she can't take
your constant Quake playing? Are you finding yourself just
a little too attracted to the game models? Then talk
to Mynx and she'll sort it all out for you!
Back, by popular demand:
an all new Dear efnet
Okay, i've got this odd problem that isn't really all that
life affecting, it's just somewhat embarrassing. Okay, here goes. I've not-so-recently
starting have sex with this girl. It seems that a lot
of the time when i climax i seem to lose ALL muscle
control. It's like i'll try to support myself when were are in the
missionary position but to no avail. I seem to just lose control of
the muscles in my arms. It's like when trying to bench
press a lot of wieght and you arms start giving out
on you. It happens all over my body. In "doggie-style" it isn't so
bad, but every once in a while it'll happen too, where
i almost fall over. Now, she is the first girl i have
had sex with without a condomn(the pill is great). But it
happens with condomns on as well. Also, in the midst of
an orgasm do folks usually keep 'thrusting', i do, that could
be the problem. anyway, HELP ME.
(garotte) Try not to look for a
dead fish. Aim for the pillow.
(mynx) i don't usually mind
being collapsed on, it's not that bad
(grindking) it's cuz
he wants to sound like a mad lover
(garotte) Unless you
are covered in sweat, jism, and cheese, it's not too bad if
you pass out on her. (mynx) mmm cheese
(Daelin) That's not at all bad.
Over time you'll probably get more muscle control, but
unconcsious pelvic motion is part of an orgasm (look it up in
(Daelin) Also, sex without a condom is
(mynx) yes, but naughty
(grindking) not naughty
(pavedroad) maybe if she tied him up he wouldn't fall over
(mynx) that is a worthwhile point :P
er... is it
normal to find hunter more attractive than mynx?
(garotte) Mynx, hunter like that guy on tv?
no, but now that you mention it, meow, he is sexy :P
(garotte) I'm thinking of Lorenzo Llamas, dunno who Hunter
(grindking) i dunno who he is
enormous, like 6 foot 5
(mynx) but no, they mean hunter,
(mynx) as opposed to mynx, the bot
find Crash to be more attractive than mynx, personally
(mynx) and you claim to love me
(garotte) Um, how can
either bot be sexy when the odds of having sex with either is
a million to one? (mynx) silentbob: sexor: hunter bot or mynx
(S|lentBob) mynx: hmm, how badly might I be hurt? :P
(mynx) S|lentBob: pretty badly.
(S|lentBob) it's purely the attire
(Daelin) Well.. I've never seen
you with a space helmet on
Puff Daddy's Puffies
First of , I know my English is bad and I
didn't know any other way to start ( + sucking up is always a
good start :). I'm a perfectly normal 16 year old guy exept
for one thing, my nipples. Since about a year I noticed
I have puffy nipples. I know some girls have this but I never
saw it on any men , and I'm really embaressed about it. I did
some searching and I found it sometimes happens too people who
do drugs and stuff. And that you can
have it removed if you have a woman lik chest too. I've been
thinking about just piercing them with a needle. What my question is, since
I don't have a larger chest. Can I just pierce them
and let the fluid run out and let it grow shut
like an earring or something. Since we have swimming in school
next week I'm affraid I can't hide it anymore. Please
help me Mynx. You are my last hope, and since I
haven't got the courage to tell it too my parents or anyone
and I'm not old or brave enough to talk
to a doctor. Even talking to you anonymously
took some convincing of myself. Save me from being a social outkast.
(garotte) Dude, you need to get a
gymnoplastia. That's plastic surgery for removing all that
mammary fat, so you don't end up having manboobz.
gibbler, how did you solve this problem? :P
mynx: artificial nipples are always an option. They're shiny,
(gibbler) mynx: what, having big nipples?
i got my nose enlarged, nobody noticed after that
everyone in my family has big nipples
(mynx) my poor little
baby cousin inherited them even
(mynx) he's this little
tiny dude with puffies
(garotte) He's probably got higher
than normal levels of estrogen leading to some breast tissue.
He'll end up with boobz that kid.
(mynx) well, i'm not so
sure it's boobz, just nipples
(Daelin) Puffy nipples are
good! There's probably something subconcious about puffy
nipples being better to grab onto, thus physicially better at
being a mother, but nipples are like.. the thing. More than
big breasts (just barely) a nice nipple will turn heads and
make guys just wanna go "Grr!" and..
(garotte) Mynx, all
the more reason to see a doctor, before he poses in manboob
magazine. (Daelin) And piered nipples suck (in the bad way)
(SpoonMaN-) whys that
(mynx) mmm manboob
(pavedroad) maybe if he got enough nipplerings, it would
cover up the nipples
(garotte) All men should have nipple
piercings. They will look all cute!
(Daelin) (nerve loss,
dead skin, other sources of cheese...)
(mynx) i say again,
No Wang-Eye Connection
i heard from a
friend that masturbating can cause blindness or something... can it really
do something like that?
(grindking) i hate
all still have our sight :P
(garotte) Masturbation is
good. Masurbation often, but don't neglect your asshole. It
needs love too.
*mynx eyes garotte
I love myself. So, done, and ... done.
mynx: Yes. it's all true. just whack off until you need
(S|lentBob) mynx: sure it can, but close your
eyes and you shouldn't have a problem :P
in sex ed in school, they were going through all the myths of
masturbation, and the teacher says like, "other myths include
having sticky hands" and all the men in the room are like,
uhm, hmm, that one's true....
(garotte) I should submit my
last eye-exam. I'm getting close to legally blind.
There should be a study to prove that jizz, while being full
of healthy protiens and vitamins, actually has more benefit to
your eyes that stuff in those eyedrops that that time machine
in 1976 needed
(Belhade) Serfer: only if you spew into
(mynx) i put breastmilk in the kids' eyes :P
(Belhade) which is nasty
(mynx) but uh baby batter in
the eyes hurts :P
(Zanshin) nothing like a nice jizzy
sting in your eye
(Daelin) Hairy palms on the other
(garotte) Sometimes dictionary entries are so
pithy. "Sexual stimulation or gratification of the self. " http://www.graylab.ac.uk/cgi-bin/omd?query=masturbation
(Belhade) I do not have hairy palms, and I often jack it
twice a day
(garotte) maybe getting keys stuck together is a normal
(garotte) Playing with Pontius Pilates
(Daelin) Anyway, just to set the record
staight; the only thing masturbation can give you is a case of
skin rash (from doing it too much), temporary loss of
sensitivity, and a possible case of Embarressing Circumstance
(a terminal disease in many parts of the galaxy.)
Out of curiosity,
when does the average male's penis actually stop growing and
reach it's maximum... Potential. Is it 14 or 15?
Or do you still have some ways to go at that age?
Maybe 17? Thanks!
(grindking) mynx; that totally depends on
(mynx) doesn't one continue growing until about
(mynx) on average?
(garotte) Although I imagine
finding the study proving that wlil be hard to prove with
typical college students, and there...oh-so-frequent sex
(Belhade) generally "early twenties"
(SpoonMaN-) i know it doesnt stop at 14-15
mynx: i think growth pretty much stops by 19 or so
when was the last time you guys measured?
probably about a year ago
(Serfer) it's not like your
penis keeps growing though, it doesn't get noticably larger
after 15 or so...
(mynx) i was just wondering if any of
you measured, like, a few years ago, if you could measure
again and see :P
(garotte) Maybe it's not fair to
masturabate before going to doctor so you get bigger numbers.
(Belhade) I'll look for a ruler
(Daelin) Penis size.. I'm
pretty big at 18 and still growing. I think most guys are
through with pubic penis growth around 22, but it slows for
most around 18. Like penis size, your body never stops growing
or changing, and it's up to you to keep it up. It just seems
to stop in comparison to your pubic growing spurts (in height,
(Serfer) i measure hourly
mynx, I've been almost exactly 6" since I was 19 I thin
(mynx) i bet it LOOKS about 8 though
guys always look like they have enormous wangs
i've been a little over 7" since i was 16, but i'm only 18
now... so not terribly scientific (SpoonMaN-) im 29 inches
(garotte) enormous wangs are good.
Help me, mynxykenobie, ur my only hope! I did
something bad I put a uh something in my bottom, hoping for that prostate thing
I have herd about. Now I cant get it out and I think
it is stuck, but I haven't tried to go to the bathroom. wtf
do i do??
(garotte) Call a
proctologist and tell the truth. Anal removals are so
complicated by moving parts.
(Daelin) hahahaha, someone
took RoadTrip too seriously
(Serfer) that dude should just
poop, unless he put something sharp up there, in which case
his disembowelment would be a benefit to mankind
i'm thinking dookie,
(mynx) dookie is a good idea
(mynx) i mean, so long as he put, like, a jellybean or a
potato up there or something
(mynx) and not a fork
(Serfer) i'm thinking dookie is a dumb word
mynx: that's exactly what i said
(Daelin) I don't know
WHAT you put up your butt, hopefully you used a condom.. if
you did, or the object isn't dangerously sharp, poop it out.
If you are having trouble, I recommend a Fleet mineral oil
enema to soften and lube things up
(mynx) daelin knows
(Zanshin) mmmm, enema
(Daelin) Don't strain
though, DO NOT STRAIN. If you can't get it out, see a